Are you unsure about breaking up, or have you recently broken up? Do you find yourself confused about what to do, or not coping with the sadness of no longer being in a loving relationship? Or is it your partner (who you still care about), who isn’t coping with the idea of separation? Do you want to try and do something to make it less awful for both of you?
I provide several types of support for couples thinking of breaking up or for individuals who have already broken up, and if you think you’re in that category, look below to see what kind of counselling might suit you.
Are you thinking of breqaking up? Is one of you talking about separation and the other not keen for that to happen at all? Are both of you wondering if there is any point going onwards?
If this is the case, discernment counselling is much more appropriate for you than relationship counselling.
Discernment Counselling is different to normal relationship counselling. It is a short series of sessions that help couples discern what is appropriate for them out of three options: 1. staying together as things are, with no change or 2. separating or 3. committing to a period of relationship counselling to save the relationship.
Are you feeling hurt, bereft or shell-shocked after losing a relationship? Or are you just really, really angry?
Without even realising it, having a long-term romantic adult partner quickly becomes a huge re-assurance in our life. Even if the relationship is rocky, knowing that you are somehow connected to a partner gives you a sense of belonging and safety that you may not even recognise until it is gone.
This is why experiencing grief after we separate is so natural. And even those people not feeling sad, just feeling furious and indignant, are somehow angry because of the break in this bond.
As I talk about on my grief after separation page, these kind of feelings are very hard to unpack and sort out, and yet, finding a way of working through them without feeling like you are driving your friends and family mad, is difficult.
Click here to read how I can support you with grief after separation counselling.
If you have broken up and are feeling confused and stressed with the family law system, you can come to me for family law counselling or “break-up coaching” to help get through this difficult time.
You may need an accountant, a mediator or a lawyer on your case to help you with making parenting arrangements or dividing up your property, but it will not be their role to support you emotionally. For some people, getting extra emotional support helps them get through the process, and helps them avoid making decisions that they may later regret.
